I applied to be a volunteer worker for the Republican National Convention back in June.  (I'm nonpartisan).  Created to host the 2004 Republican National Convention in New York City the Host Committee is a non-partisan not for profit organization.  The online application (powered by Monster and in association with QuickHire) required me to enter my social security number, my drivers license number, previous home addresses, education level and other pertinent facts that would enable them to perform a thorough background check on me. 

FLASHBACK:  In my sophomore year at Ferris State University I was arrested when I rode a bicycle down a steep staircase from inside an old apartment building.  Unfortunately the bike wasn't mine and I had been drinking.  From the lockup I called my journalism advisor who now works at the Grand Rapids Press and asked her to help me out by showing up with fifty bucks (My advisor is the same person who once said: "Sure, Norman has got imagination, imagination gone wild, but what good is it?"). 

What good is it?  Huh?

In the end, my journalism classmate (Gail from the upper peninsula) bailed me out.  Later on I appeared before a magistrate and he explained how I could expunge the entire event from my record which I'm pretty sure I did.

Oops.  Would the New York City Host Committee reject me because of the bike incident?

On August 10th I received an e-mail and an offer to work as an official volunteer with the city's welcoming and greeting programs and was told to report for a special 90 minute training program for all out of state applicants on Wednesday August 25th.

So much for the bike incident.
 
I e-mailed the Host Committee that I would be attending the training program and went online and booked a flight on American Airlines for my arrival on the 25th and hotel reservations at the Milford Plaza at 270 West 45th Street.

On the 19th of August I got another e-mail from the Host Committee informing me that I was one of only a few hundred people from across the country selected to travel to New York (They had around 20,000 overall applicants mostly from New York and trimmed it down to less than half that number).   I was an "All-America" volunteer and was told to report to 498 Seventh Avenue at 6 pm (In the Fashion district).  A staffer would greet me in the lobby.

During the American Airlines flight I imagined myself entering the RNC Host Committee Volunteer Office.  There'd be smiling Republicans and people wanting to shake my hand and maybe even a pat or two on my back.  Though there wasn't any pay involved or housing I was given a unique chance to support our president.  This was big.  Real big (and I'm not even a Republican).

My hotel was only a short walk to Times Square, Madison Square Garden, Famiglia Pizzeria and the Imperial Theatre where I saw Hugh Jackman standing near the stage door (He's starring in the hit musical The Boy From Oz based on the life of Peter Allen).
   
My room on the tenth floor (room 1028) was small but nice and it had a really deep bathtub.  This was good for me.  I prefer baths to showers.  At 5 pm I proceeded to walk to the Host Committee Volunteer office.  I walked down Eighth Avenue (past Famiglia Pizza, $2 for a slice of cheese) turned left on 42nd Street (past Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum and The Amsterdam Theater where Kissy Simmons is starring in the Broadway play The Lion King.  Kissy and I once starred in a play together in Ybor City titled A Little Traveling Music.  I left a note for her at the stage door and the next day she called me at my hotel.  It was nice).  I kept walking 'till I ran into Seventh Avenue then turning right walking some more 'til I found the building that housed the RNC Volunteer Offices.

I wasn't greeted by a Host Committee staffer and their were no smiling Republicans wanting to shake my hand or pat me on the back.  Instead a tall security guard asked me for identification and then took my picture and then handed me a temporary visitor badge made out of paper with an adhesive backing.  "That way," he said then pointing to elevators.

Host Committee staffers required everyone to sign release forms.  One of the forms said that we could be killed.  When the documents were completed a man named Roger took my picture digitally.

The training program was led by a tie wearing Canadian holding a hand held remote control which he pushed whenever he wanted to project a new slide.  It was supposed to last 90 minutes, we were through in 17.  He told us what to wear (khakis or skirts)  showed us a few demographics and answered questions. 
I met other volunteers, too:  A fat lobbyist from D.C. and an elderly woman who fell asleep by the second slide.

Didn't the sleeping woman know how big this was?

Jeez...

It was the first ever Republican National Convention held in the summer in NYC and I was a part of it!

That night I walked around Manhattan, I ate,  and I stuck a dollar into a machine at the Internet Cafe on 42nd and checked my e-mail.  Later on I bathed using the deep tub.  I was scheduled to work 8-1 pm Thursday, Friday and Saturday.

20,000 applicants and I was picked.  I've always been lucky.  I set the alarm clock and tried to sleep.

Thursday.  I was out the door by 7:30 am stopping first at McDonald's then downing a sausage McMuffin and a Coca-Cola.  I was in the Host Committee office at 8:16 am (They moved to another office and neglected to tell the volunteers or I would have been there at 8 sharp).

I was a Volunteer Pool Emergency Staffer.  Dan, the overworked Commander of Volunteer Operations explained what that meant:  "Whatever needs to be done you'll do it," he said.

"Sounds real good," I said, smiling.  It didn't sound real good at all especially  when I was told to count thousands of campaign buttons.  Later that day I put special holographic-like stickers onto hundreds of volunteer ID's before they were to be laminated (The ID's should have been kept locked down and given only to select personnel not to a guy they just met.  I could have easily taken 50 or even a hundred of them and if I was the wrong person used them for whatever).  During my shift I also helped to bring up a large and  very heavy box of convention posters (They sell them for $25 each).

At the Host Committee Office I met Laura and a man who told me to call him, "Chief."  Chief was very intelligent, charming and enjoyed deep conversation.  He was eager to be useful and was unhappy when he was not being utilized.  He plans on being a dentist.  Laura impressed me as well.  She spoke impeccably, was very pretty and would soon be attending a $35,000 a year college.  Her older sister worked for the Host Committee as well (I think there was some sort of sister rivalry thing going on between them).

The two of them made my RNC volunteer experience worthwhile.

The next day I unloaded boxes from a truck that contained cardboard mailing tubes used to ship the posters I had helped bring up the day before.  I enjoyed talking to the non-union driver and working with an employee of the city's newly formed marketing department. He was excited about its formation and his job and he worked with a pleasant man named Lloyd.

Later in my shift I rolled those posters then pushing them into lightweight cardboard shipping tubes.  Some of the volunteers got paper cuts and one woman said the ink on the freshly printed posters made her nauseous.  Didn't she know how big this was?

Friday at around noon I walked to Madison Square Garden.  There was a group of people entering the convention hall wearing blue shirts that said, We Blew Up The Balloons at The 2004 Republican Convention.  As a Host Committee Volunteer I was given a dark blue shirt (unavailable anywhere) with embroidered stitching on it (NYC 2004 Be A Part Of It).  Without hesitation I stood in the line with them and casually walked through every checkpoint and into the hall.

I was shocked that I did it and even more shocked that I got in.

I wasn't asked for identification (not even once) though I did see a few  individuals who were stopped and questioned.  Unfortunately I was unable to remove the small  disposable camera from my sock as I would have been discovered but my camera could have been something much worse (I reported this dangerous loophole to ABC News and a woman named Wendy said: "I can't be bothered with this," and hung up).

Huh?  O Captain!  My Captain!

I hadn't planned on entering the convention hall.  It was the furthest thing from my mind.  I figured I'd take a few exterior snapshots, hope for an all nude female protest and maybe gulp down one of those gigantic pretzels they sell on every downtown corner.  It just sort of happened but it was the Republican National Convention at Madison Square Garden and once the line started moving I couldn't back out for fear of looking suspicious and at a certain point I didn't care.  I know what I am and who I am and whatever might have happened would've been worth it.  I was there in the Garden in New York City 2004 and I put convention posters in cardboard mailing tubes and I counted campaign buttons and I put stickers on ID's and I unloaded trucks and I carried boxes and I got to meet people that I would never have had the opportunity to meet and that was the best part of it all. 
     

* I was stopped and questioned when exiting the convention hall. Dan was promoted from Host Committee Volunteer to paid employee.  I heard that some of the ID's I had worked on were accidentally destroyed during the laminating process.  I enjoyed the freight elevator operator.  He was soft-spoken, admitted that the job could be boring but believed something better would eventually come his way.  On the flight home the captain asked everyone to stay seated (upon landing) and while we were staying seated several police officers boarded the plane and escorted three men off the aircraft.  They were sitting in the seats behind me.  I thought they were coming for me (American Airlines Flight 1621).  I was seated next to the emergency exit door.  I'm always assigned a seat near the door.

On Monday night (8/30), Thomas Frampton, a 21-year-old student wearing a volunteer shirt (he even went through the training I mention above) got within 10 feet of Vice President Dick Cheney. Your correspondent tried to expose this vulnerability three days earlier but it was to no avail.