Thursday October 12, 2006
	Devils night in Detroit.
	"You lived in Detroit?" says my date.  We're shopping for pumpkins and she's walking alongside me and on each side of the aisle that we're walking down are pumpkins of all shapes and sizes. "I lived in Detroit," I say.  "Halloween is great when you grow up in Detroit." "Atlanta ain't so bad, either," she says.  She's wearing shoes that you might see a topless dancer wear and sometimes her heels gets stuck (they're about four inches long) and when the heels get stuck (in the soft dirt) we stop so she can un stick them.   "Atlanta doesn't have Devils Night," I say. "Devils night?" she says. She wants to find a pumpkin and make a homemade pumpkin pie.  I've done this once before.  Years ago my hump and I were cutting a pumpkin into small pieces (per the recipe) and we ended up balling one another on the kitchen floor (When we were done with the humping neither of us had any interest in finishing the pie so we chucked it and I went home less one load). I say: "On Devils Night (before Halloween) you go out with your friends and destroy shit." She says:     "Break things? I say: "Destroy other peoples property.  It's dark out and you're with your friends and you're laughing and you do things like kick pumpkins in, break windows, start fires, drop bowling balls onto passing cars, things like that." She's leaning down to inspect a pumpkin and while she's inspecting it she says: "And that's fun?" I say: "When it's someone else's property it can be lots of fun." "I never heard of it," she says.  When she stands she loses her balance ('cause of her shoe heels) and she falls toward me and our lips are maybe a half inch apart and for just a second (like something you'd see in a motion picture) we look into one another's eyes before we kiss and when we're done kissing I say:  "I thought every state had Devils Night.  It wasn't 'til just a few years ago that I realized it was just a Detroit thing." She says: "That's really something." I say: "One year we scoped out this house a couple of blocks from mine and the whole family was inside.  You could see 'em. They had this big picture window and everyone was seated around a table. They were eating.  It was nice.  They had a pumpkin on the porch and a cardboard skeleton taped to the door and there they were eating and laughing and talking.  I was jealous so I went to the porch picked up the pumpkin and threw it through the picture window." She says: "Huh?" I say: "People we're yelling and dogs were barking and lights were being turned on and me and all the other guys were running with everything we had and while we were running we were laughing. I was a made man after that." She says: "Is that shit on the pumpkin?  Wipe the shit off that pumpkin Norman." I say:  "I would have thrown my f-ckin' body through that window if I could have been sure that their back door was open.  I've regretted that for years." She's walked away from me and her big American purse is open and she's handing the cashier money and when she's close enough to me she says: "Did you get the shit off?" I say: "Clean as a whistle." PREVIOUS   HOME   NEXT